Finding a Little Grace

We have finally moved the office. Its been difficult, but the moving is done. All the boxes have finally been shifted from the old place to the new place. Though they may not be unpacked yet, at least they're all there. I may not find my new projects file just yet, but I know its in one of the boxes that were carted into my new office this afternoon. The move has got me thinking about change. and new beginnings. We move on after a break-up, we move on after a loved one has passed on, we move on from singlehood to marriage, and from marriage after a divorce. We move up a dress size or down, for the lucky few. When things change, we move on. Now, we may not like hauling boxes up the two floors of the new office, but once you behold the view from there, it is worth it. We may not want to move on from a bad relationship, but when we welcome a much nicer person into our lives, it's worth the pain. We may like our single lives with all the freedom and independence that comes with it,...

“Illness is the night-side of life, a more onerous citizenship. Everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the sick. Although we all prefer to use only the good passport, sooner or later each of us is obliged, at least for a spell, to identify ourselves as citizens of that other place.” Susan Sontag. I like Susan Sontag's observation on illness. But there're many of us who hold almost a constant passport in the night-side of life. The many of us who have invisible aches and pains on a daily basis. Those of us who require frequent renewal as the pages of our night-side passports are full. I was 20 when i realised something was not quite right. I had the occasional joint pain, especially after a night out, but i would put it to dancing in high heels. All my life, till i was 27, i could fully agree with Ms. sontag's, as i fully had the good passport with only the occasional bad one. Slightly over two years ago, in March of 200...

After a protracted and ardous search for new office space that has enough space and doesnt cost the earth, the universe obliged. The initial joy of finding a space has been quickly replaced by the terror of moving. Anyone who has moved, any size of house or office know one thing without a doubt:Moving sucks! Moving sucks energy, moving sucks time, moving sucks money. It would be a fair assessment to say that moving sucks living out of life. I am also quite sure that my planned weekend trip to the Maasai Mara will be sucked as well..Think about it for a moment: Am in khaki pants, black sleeveless top with a hermes scarf stylishly tied to my hat - No one said you have to dress down in the bush - sitting in a lounge chair at my (our? who knows a girl can get lucky)tent's balcony, a dry martini in hand, reading my latest book, watching the animals along the mara river as a beautiful african sun sets in the horizon..Then picture the most likely scenario this weekend..wearing overalls,...

I need grace. A lot of grace. And patience. and resilience. Why, you may ask, do i need all these virtues? Well, let me tell you a story. A few months ago, the lease at our office and factory expired. We therefore needed to find new office and factory space to move into ASAP. Our current landlord was kind enough to extend a grace period as we looked for suitable space. In may, i was hospitalised and the search ground to a halt..in mid June, as i felt better physically, the search was restarted. All i can say is, I have been to hell and back. From con men who purport to own offices and factories and are only interested in fleecing you, real estate agents who never call back to racist factory owners who have a problem with black folk. Am done. Am so done. Last week, i found a space that was suitable to our needs (most factories are so large and hence very expensive), met the very kind agent, viewed the space and started negotiating for the space. The owner, an elderly man of Asian descen...

Today i have 2 dates..which i must attend to. Afternoon coffee date with a dude i met 3 weeks ago. He works out of town and is around for a few days..then dinner, with an older man. Had dinner last wednesday with the same man, an old school gentleman who takes you out for an actual dinner in a nice restaurant and drinks afterwards and does not expect you to put out. Most of the younger men i have been out with think that buying you coffee or drinks equals a roll in the hay..and have no idea that asking a girl out after 7pm means dinner. I've had a few ask me whether am hungry..ofcourse am hungry; I just left the office, battled the evening traffic to meet you and now you're asking whether am hungry? No, my office serves lunch and dinner, you oaf. Not. Am sold on dating older guys. They are more attentive, talk about things other than themselves, dont expect me to put out on a timeline, actually listen when i talk, have many interesting experiences to share and they feed you. Wh...

Remember the popular song by CeCe Peniston 'Finally its happened to me...and i just cannot hide it..finally'? No, am not talking about love, am still waiting for that, but the guts to write and perhaps share with others my thoughts, musings, whinings and wins. This blog was initiated at the suggestion of Dr. Mugambi, a wonderful doctor, to share about how a young Kenyan woman deals with lupus on a day-to-day basis as opposed to continually whine at every appointment about the latest malady(ies)..So I figured, why just talk about lupus? While lupus is a constant and daily companion in my life, and must get its proper due, i have a full life that revolves around running a family company, trying to find love (its a jungle out there, i tell you), being fulltime member of a brilliant eccentric (and slightly dysfunctional) family, trawling the bookstores and coffeeshops.. It took a long time to decide to write the blog, i wasnt too sure (am still not) that i could write something leg...